Quarantine Introspection — What is success?
I was lying in bed in my dark room. Five alarms went off, but I was still adhesively attached to my bed. Every so often, I shifted to hit the snooze button before sleeping again. That day, I intended to go on a 5 am run to embrace the radiant golden rays touch my skin as the sun rises and the morning summer breeze blowing through my hair. But did that happen?
No.
I had no motivation to get up. I felt like I had no purpose in life. Every day was indistinguishable from the day before. However, the following morning was different. Instead of sleeping in or going on my phone, I laid in my bed as thoughts permeated my mind. After a few moments, I rose from my bed with one thought stuck to my mind. What does success mean to me?
Success is relative to every individual, as everyone has their interpretation of its definition. When you think of success, who comes to mind? For some individuals, they associate success with celebrities who are rich, famous, living in mansions, and that have the latest fad in their possession. Those who interpret success in such a manner will try to attain success through means of money, fame, and being materialistic because they aspire to be like these celebrities. They are extrinsically motivated to accomplish goals for the sake of external forces such as fame, praise, and money. At a point in life, I thought this was the ultimate definition of success. However, even my definition of success underwent a series of alterations as I grew up. Let’s start from the beginning.
Growing up, my parents always taught me the importance of school and education. My ultimate goal back then was to obtain high marks. Teachers use to praise other students for doing well on tests and quizzes because they acquired high grades. Therefore, doing well in school was one of my definitions of success.
However, I concluded that I would not be doing school for the rest of my life. As a result, when school is over, and teachers do not grade me anymore, what would success mean to me? As time passed, I started to associate success with celebrities that are rich and famous because of media. I thought fame and money ultimately brought them success and hence happiness.
In hindsight, I discovered that money is merely an amplifier. If you an individual were miserable when they had no money, you are still going to be miserable with money. If you were materialistic before, you are even more materialistic when you are rich. Money is not tantamount to success.
After this realization, I considered that success is when you achieve happiness, but I quickly eliminated that definition because happiness is simply a moment. When I am unhappy or neutral, does that mean I am not successful? Not necessarily. Life is like a rollercoaster full of ups and downs. You cannot be happy all the time. Similarly, you cannot be at the acme of your life rollercoaster perpetually.
My definition of success is to be the best version of myself at all times. The description of the best version of oneself may vary from person to person. Personally, I have four core values that fabricate the best version of myself. These values are: being intentional, authentic, challenging myself, and having tenacity. I find that being intentional is very crucial because how you do anything dictates how you do everything. This is how I have built strong relationships and friendships.
Equally as important, being authentic and cultivating the courage to show people our vulnerable side inspires loyalty and trust. Being authentic to oneself and others requires mindfulness, self-awareness, and self-acceptance. I also firmly believe that challenging myself intellectually will help me grow as an individual by actively seeking discomfort and challenges.
And at times you feel that there is no light at the end of the tunnel, and you feel like relinquishing your dreams or goals. That is the reason why I am adamant about raising my tenacity a few notches. This is because even if I hit rock bottom, but I still have the tenacity and that drive, I am practically unstoppable. This is my definition of success.
After finding my definition of success, I quickly pulled out my journal and set goals for myself. I realized that I choose whether or not to be the best version of myself. It is in my control. The next morning, instead of sleeping in or going on my phone, I woke up, got ready, and started the morning by hitting the pavement.
